“Pet Names”

“Sweet Cheeks” and “Snookums” don’t frequent my lips,

as deadly as words like “Waistline” and “Hips.”

“Muffin” and “Puddin'” are in the same class,

calling her that puts me right on my ass.

Naming her “Kitten” might give her some pause,

while coming at me with very sharp claws.

“Sugar” and “Pickle” I never will use,

unless I like sporting a very large bruise.

“Pet Names” for her is just not her thing,

using them only grief would they bring.

For forty and five we’re married as one,

I just call her “Dear” and the others for fun.