“Tech Smart”

I’m “Tech Smart” as any Gent, whose Prime Time has Come and Went. I’ll challenge any Three-Year-Old, with the Knowledge that I Hold. When I think of “Gigabytes”, eating Burgers in Two Bites. My phone’s got just “Thirty-Two,” still a Lot of Food to Chew. A “Browser”, “Scanning”, “Windows” screens, a Peeping Tom to me […]

My Bachelor Party (the night before) to My Wedding Day (50+ years ago)

M-A-R-R-I-A-G-E “M” is For the “Many” beers I poured into Me. “A” is For the “Altar” I Could barely See. “R” is For the “Real” fear what’s Churnin’ down Below. “R” is For the “Ribs” and Smirks hoping I might Blow “I” is For the “Impact” as she Came my Way. “A” is For the […]

Scuttle the Bombing Run

I like to Keep my Ride shined Up, been that Way since was a Pup. Wash and Wax and View with Pride, probably Shows my Anal Side? Just this Morning – Looking Great, never Knowing ‘bout My Fate. From above was Splattered Thrice, Hood and then the Windshield Twice. Attack was Swift – a Bird […]

Double Chin

Double Chin – don’t Chagrin, see the Company that you’re In. Alex Baldwin – Michael Moore, Donald Trump adds To the Score. Mine is Growing Sun to Moon, Expanding like some Big Balloon. Suck it Up – Don’t get the Knife, seems It’s part of Living Life. So just Take it On the Chin, you […]

Equal Rights

Donuts are my Big Downfall, Filled or Not – Large or Small. Polish off in Nothing Flat, proudly Wear my “Donut Fat.” “Long Johns” are My favorite Choice, though Today I heard a Voice, as I Stared through Baker Panes, wondered Why there’s no “Long Janes?” So right Now let’s Start a Wave, stand with […]


Whiter Teeth to Proud Extender, Lighter Beer to Younger Render. Love Them, Hate Them, In-between, now a Part of Life’s Cuisine. How long Have they been Around? Surely long as Sight and Sound. ‘Bout time for a Whistle Blower, started With an Apple Grower. Had an Orchard just called Eden, not sure Where – perhaps […]


Hemorrhoids – Don’t be Annoyed, You strained Hard – should be Enjoyed.  Embarrassment – no Need to Hide, You built from Scratch – Wear with Pride.    Constipation – Nasty Word, Easy Peasy is Preferred. Slide things Out without a Hitch, But sometimes Can be a Glitch.   Don’t despair You’re not Alone, as You […]

Clumsy Clean-Up Job

Like the News to Know what’s Up, so I’m not a Clueless Schlup. Heard the Term on Early News, at a Time with Not much Views. The Anchor said It to Demean, a Member of the Pres’ Team. But my Brain changed It a Bit, to What’s occurred or ‘Bout to Hit. As for “Clumsy […]

“Cut the Cheese”

“Cut the Cheese” – you’ve Heard the Term, might Make even Some to Squirm. Love the Smell – the Feel to It, don’t Dislike a single Bit! Make no Diff who Cuts it First, a Tiny slice or One big Burst. At the Deli or the Store, always Leaves me wanting More. Feta, Swiss, or […]


At my Age the morning Brings, Ecstasy at Potty Rings. Lift the Lid as I’ve been Taught, is a Battle never Fought. As I Ponder half way Through, was There anything I knew, to Make me Stop exactly Then, and Somewhat later start Again? Broken Dam – Fire Hose, bad Examples I Suppose. Burglars, Storms, […]